TOMFOOLERY

ROUGH CROSSING
Directed by Michael Rafkin; written by Tom Stoppard and adapted from Ferenc Molnár’s Play at the Castle
With: Robert Boardman, David Edwards, Mark Honan, Marcy McGuigan, Daniel Noel, and Bryant Richards
At Portland Stage Company in Portland, Maine
From January 24 to February 19, 2006

Reviewed by Laurie Meunier Graves

Long, long ago, in a society far, far away, audiences got their kicks by watching comedies, on stage and at the movies, whose plots revolved around the Fallen Woman and the Wronged Man. There were, of course, variations on the theme, but here was the central idea: a beautiful woman, usually blonde and always irresistible, somehow managed to succumb all too willingly to the charms of a rascally cad with smarmy good looks. Since the woman and the cad were not married to each other, this provided endless titillation to that long-ago audience. However, writers, seldom content with simplicity of plot, had to pile it on even higher. Into the mix was thrown a husband or a fiancé, a gullible fool who adored his blonde “angel,” placing her high on a pedestal, only to watch brokenheartedly as she betrayed him and tumbled to the earth. Did the Fallen Woman slink away in shame? Indeed, she did not. By some plot machination and a great deal of deception, she usually managed to convince the Wronged Man that all was not as it seemed, and the whole affair was one jolly mistake. The Wronged Man, being a sap, generally fell for this malarkey and ended up being happily reunited with the Fallen Woman.

Now, I am the first to admit that this Fallen Woman/Wronged Man theme was a vast improvement on earlier ideas about women and sexuality, on ideas found in Hawthorne’s The Scarlet Letter or Richardson’s Clarissa. Nevertheless, it is a tired old chestnut that long ago lost its flavor and appeal. In short, this plot device, stale and outdated, just isn’t that funny anymore.

Tom Stoppard apparently didn’t feel this way and, as recently as 1984, thought it was still fresh. His Rough Crossing, in performance at Portland Stage Company, uses the Fallen Women/Wronged Man device. Rough Crossing is set in the 1930s on a luxury cruise ship, and, in an attempt to liven things up, Stoppard throws in other folderol. There is Dvornichek (Mark Honan), a cheeky steward who downs the passengers’ cognacs. There is a pair of playwrights, Turai (Robert Boardman) and Gal (Daniel Noel), who must finish their play, The Cruise of the Dodo, before the ship reaches New York. This gives Stoppard the opportunity to have a play within a play, replete with puns and naughty references to “poop deck” and “being kissed on the stern” and a plot so confusing that it doesn’t even seem worth it to try to figure it out. We are also treated to Adam (Bryant Richards), a musician whose terrifying mother induces in him a speech impediment that comes and goes; a slinky leading lady named Natasha (Marcy McGuigan); and a slick leading man named Ivor (David Edwards).

Naturally, Adam plays the part of the Wronged Man, and the fair Natasha is the Fallen Woman, who succumbs to, you guessed it, Ivor’s charms. Natasha, with Turai’s help, wriggles out of her predicament when she is caught, as the saying goes, in a compromising situation. What does Turai do? Why, incorporate the compromising situation into the plot of the unfinished The Cruise of the Dodo to make it seem as though Natasha and Ivor were practicing rather than fooling around. Does Adam fall for this? Does the word “sap” have three letters?

Despite its tired plot, Rough Crossing does have some funny moments, and, while there are no outstanding performances, the cast does a solid job with this slight play. Additionally, Stoppard’s script has a liberal dollop of verbal gymnastics, and his catty observations about actors and writers are amusing.

Unfortunately, this is not enough to rescue the play from its triteness. The characters are so one-dimensional that it is impossible to feel any connection with them, and, in the end, I didn’t care whether Adam and Natasha separated or reconciled. As substantial and nourishing as cotton candy, Rough Crossing contains no insight into human nature nor does it touch on deeper issues, say, the way The Foreigner does. While the audience did seem to enjoy Rough Crossing, it is a play on the order of Arsenic and Old Lace, better suited for community players than for a professional troupe. Carolyn Hay, of the Boston Phoenix, called Rough Crossing “pure piffle,” and she was exactly right.

In the 1930s, I suppose the Fallen Woman/Wronged Man scenario was daring and racy. After all, it sure beat having to wear a big scarlet A on your chest or, even worse, dying to defend your honor. However, things have changed, and I propose we lay the Fallen Woman and the Wronged Man to their much-deserved rest. Their time has come and gone. For good, I hope. 

 

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